Her Last 5-Year-Old Day

Lizzy's 6th birthday is on January 20th. A friend of mine inadvertently brought to my attention that the day before Lizzy turns six will be her last day as a 5-year-old. I stopped a sec and let that sink in and then, of course, the nostalgia started flooding through me and I caught myself looking at baby pictures of my sweet Elizabeth.

Look at those cheeks!! I just want to squeeze that baby and I know the girl who was once this baby still lives with me and I can squeeze her and kiss her cheeks any time I like, but, but, they aren't those  chubby cheeks.

Look at that sweet girl! I love her sweet hands and her button nose and her toothless grin and that hair that hadn't quite decided what color it would be or whether it would be curly or straight. That same girl lives in my house, but she's different now and although I love the girl she is now, a part of me longs to hold that baby in my arms while she sleeps and watch her toddling around the house and look at the world through those toddler eyes where everything is amazing and wonderful.

This is my sweet, loving, kind, thoughtful, smart, inquisitive, talented, responsible, spiritual, silly, giggly, friendly, like-boys-already, drama queen, mother-henning-her-brother, dancing, singing, musical, cuddling, scientific, reading, independent daughter who can't wait to grow up.

I told her this morning that this was her last day being 5-years-old. She drew this picture for me - a self- portrait of her 5-year-old self

I love her more than I have words to tell and I am sooooo excited for her future and she amazes me every day and the world will be a better place because that angelic little baby in the pictures above grew up. But...you know what I'm going to say...let me just say this...

My arms had been so empty for so long. I wanted a baby to hold for almost 9 long years (which I know is nothing compared to some women - especially those who will have to wait a whole earth life before they hold a baby of their own) Once she did come, I didn't want to forget or take for granted how wonderful it felt. I knew she was constantly growing up and she wouldn't be little forever. So, several times over the past 6 years, usually as I was holding her while she was sleeping, I have said a little prayer, "Father, please help my arms always remember what it feels like to hold this sweet baby girl."


I remember. I most definitely remember and I always will.