Dear Sarah,
I've been thinking a lot about you lately. I really couldn't tell you why, except that maybe turning 38 was hard for me for some reason. I felt so old. I know I'm not but that is how I felt. I think most people think I'm so much younger than I really am because I have young children and probably because I'm so immature! (That was a joke - I hope.)
I have no idea how old you were when Isaac was born - I'm guessing somewhere in your 80's or 90's. Did you all of a sudden find yourself sitting with all of the first time mothers who were much, much younger than you - watching your children play together and feeling like you had magically been inducted into a club that you just could never have belonged to before - no matter how hard you tried to understand? Was seeing life through their eyes amazing and interesting and refreshing, but you knew you didn't want to forget what it felt like to be in that other group - The Waiting Club? It's nice to see things from many perspectives, I've discovered. There are several other clubs life has signed me up for which have taught me new perspectives, deep, soul-searching, grateful heart making perspectives. But that is a letter for another day.
Anyway, I honestly don't know why you have been on my mind so much lately but maybe I could leave you with this...Happy Mother's Day. Sheri Dew (I know you know who she is) she, who has never been married and will never bear a child in this life, says we are all mothers and it wasn't until year 7 or 8 of my waiting time that I comprehended what she really meant. We are all mothers. What an honor to be on our Father's errand of mothering His children during these last days before the Savior comes again. So many of us need a mother - even the big, bad, dudes (or should we call them The Lost Boys) who seem to be controlling everything right now - they need a mommy more than ever. A mother to discipline them and a mommy to love them, because, love, oodles and oodles of it, would make a whole lot of difference in this crazy world of ours.
So, my great, great, great to infinity and beyond great (that was from my Ben) grandmother Sarah, Happy Mother's Day. I will be eternally grateful for your mothering influence on me. Someday, I'll thank you face to face.
Love,
Lisa
I think about that often on Mother's Day. I have been blessed with two girls at a young age and a wonderful husband but there are many who haven't had that opportunity yet. I think about how many "mother's" blessed my life in my growing up years and how we are all needed, women of all situations.
ReplyDeleteI think I'm beginning to understand what it means to be a mother without having children of my own. Yesterday, I was with my husband's family and his little niece (18mos.) took to me like a fish to water and we played, walked, and had a good time. I think about my students at school and I see them for almost 8 hours a day and constantly think about the influence that I could have on them and try to be careful of that. I may not be blessed yet with children of my own, but there are children and PEOPLE all around me that need to be loved and that is something I can do.
ReplyDeleteThere are adults in the lives of my children, who do things that I cannot seem to do for them, for whatever reason. I am so grateful for the "mothering" that others have provided. It makes a huge, and vital difference.
ReplyDeleteI also want to say that understand about the clubs that life signs us up for. Life signs us up for things we would NEVER seek out, but that we can learn so much from....